Review: Before I Knew

Before I Knew by Jamie Beck
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

The Cabot and the Morgans were friends and neighbours for thirty years until a stupid dare left Joe Morgan dead, shortly afterwards Colby Cabot's husband Mark killed himself over his part in the dare, devastated by his role in the death of his best friend and unable to deal with the guilt. Mark was bi-polar and Colby suffers from the knowledge that she kept his diagnosis from her family, she also worries that his illness may have been a contributing factor to the dare that led to Joe's death.

Two years later Colby has given up her job as a lawyer to open a restaurant called ACertainTea, she has visions of it being a centre for families to come to celebrate special events. The money for the restaurant has come from the family business The Cabot Tea Company and her father has insisted that Colby reports to her brother Hunter.

Alec Morgan has always stood in the shadow of his younger brother Joe, quieter and more studious by nature he was no match for Joe's athleticism and Joe was always his father's favourite. He has also always harboured a secret crush on Colby. Formerly a successful restaurateur, he has had a massive professional disaster, lost his restaurant and has been asked by his old friend Hunter Cabot to assist Colby in her new start-up. Alec too has a secret, Mark wrote him a letter begging for forgiveness and making wild threats which Alec ignored.

So, can two people who have suffered devastating losses which intimately involve their families ever put the past aside?

This book, for me, was killed by all the angst. Angst over Joe's death, over Mark's suicide, over Colby's mother, over Colby's father, over Alec's mother, over Alec's father, over Colby's brother, over Colby's step-sister, over Colby's sister-in-law. You get the picture, we were drowning in angst and Colby felt she had to fix everything, which was a joke because her brother and father, even Alec were so damned patronising I wanted to punch them in the gonads. But then Colby was so damn drippy and saintly that I wanted to throat-punch her too!

Stepping aside from my own personal feelings about the characters, I also felt that Alec's characterisation didn't really 'work'. He was a former geek, the full "jigsaw puzzle making, then take a photo and hang it on your wall" Monty who grew into a demanding chef who shouted at people. He had loved Colby all his life and talked about doing anything she wanted, just to get her to notice him, but then he refused to change HIS menu for HER restaurant to accommodate her very reasonable request that there be some simple food for the unadventurous eaters.

Someone (an author whose book I criticised) once told me that if the characters make you feel something (even incandescent rage) then the author has achieved their goal - well done Jamie Beck, back of the net goal! But seriously, I'm not a fan of all the introspective, navel-gazing, talk about our feelings (but of course don't actually tell people what's wrong) angst. If you like that sort of thing then this is for you.

I received a free copy of this book from the publisher in return for an honest review.

Bumped for release.

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